Episode 105

Anger, Shame, Regret And Guilt.

NAZIR’S P. O. V

Sometimes life just flies by when you creating memories but what happens when those memories start to haunt you each and every day? Then what are you supposed to do. We’ll my solution was leave and run away to a place I don’t have any memories to haunt me but little did I know that no matter where I go, no matter which corner I run to all those memories would continue to haunt me.

As I touched down at the airport, I knew I could go to the one person I could always count on in any situation.

KHADIJA’S P. O. V

As Uwais and I sat down for a late breakfast our doorbell rings and both Uwais and I are wondering who could it be so early because my mother in law will only be coming the weekend. As I get up to open, I waddle slowly to open the door. Once I open it, I get a shock of my life to see Nazir standing there with his luggage.

Nazir looks at me and bursts out crying in the hall way, I pull him in the apartment with his luggage and close the door as I ask, ” What’s wrong Nazir? And what are you doing here?”

Uwais joins us when he hears the commotion. He suggested to us that we should rather go to the lounge and all questions will be answered.

But before we can even move to the lounge Nazir whispers,” I have Cancer Khadija. “ I turn around in shock as I watch my brother break down.

Not being able to do anything out of Shock, Uwais takes the lead and guides us to the lounge and brings in water for us.

” What did you say Nazir? ” I mumble

Nazir sighs and says,” I have Leaukemia Khadija “

” What,” I began shakily, “ stage Leaukemia.”

” The fourth stage, ” he replies

I ask curiously,” When did you find out..?”

His shoulders slump and says, ” I just found out two weeks ago Khalifa, it’s nearing the last stage of Leaukemia. Doctors have given me a maximum of 6 months to live. I don’t know how I can even miss it Khadija. I should have known, this is my health but it was a shock to me life.”

I stand up and go to sit next to him as I side hug him and say, “ This is Allah’s will Nazir, never ever question him.”

In my moment of silence I remember what I spoke to Munira about so I decided to broach the subject.

“Nazir, ” I began,” did you tell Munira? “

He stands up abruptly startling Uwais and I as he shouts,” Don’t even speak about her. I hate her right now. I can’t even believe I loved her at one point. “

” What happened?, “Uwais dared to ask

He began,” I knew her parents were not happy with her hanging out with me (I looked down guiltily). I wanted to marry her and she fought with her family for me. I don’t know when she changed her mind about me but I called her last week to meet me at the park and I told her that I have leukemia. She didn’t believe me, she thought I was lying to get her back. Do you even know what she said to me? She said and I quote Don’t you dare pull that trick with me. I’m not some girl you can play with OK. Do you even know what leukemia is Nazir? How can you even take something like this as a joke. Get your facts straight. You just a playboy Nazir. You like a rock and have no real feelings… Maybe one day when you lose the person you love the most breaks your heart then you will know what a heart that breaks feels like. Can you eve imagine the audacity of this girl? “, he stops to catch his breath as he continues with anguish and pain in his eyes.” I even sent her a message telling her I don’t need anyone else. I love you. I love you so much. Please just believe me. All she replied with is is I don’t care. “Nazira slumps on to the touch out of weakness and exhaustion as his shoulder heave up and down as sobs wreck his body.

I put my hand on his shoulder in a sign of comfort and support when I say,” I may have said thing about you to them to Nazir. I was wrong, so wrong and I feel really guilty right now. “

” It’s not your fault Khalifa but it’s crazy you know….. How wrong you can be about a person. I loved her through everything and yet she doesn’t care. “He says absently.

Uwais stands up and walks to Nazir and says,” Why don’t you relax and Khadija and I will make breakfast for you. “

He nods as he leans back on to the couch closing his eyes as I and Uwais leave to go to our bedroom.

Once our bedroom door is shut, I break down crying as Uwais catches me in his arms as I sob my heart out. I realized then that even tho I had a family, I was not really there for them and I distanced myself from my family. I wasn’t there for my father, for Yumna and neither their for Nazir. I hadn’t call my father once since Yumna passed away. I guess I just pushed every thing under the carpet but that stops now.

I looked at Uwais and said, “ His always closing his eyes Uwais. Like it hurts to look at things because memories start sneaking in.”

Uwais replied, “ Babe I think all we need now is to be there for him in these times.”

” I’m going to call Munira, “ I angrily say

I moved away from Uwais as I pick up my phone and call Rehana’s number. When she picked up I asked her for Munira.

” Hello”

MUNIRA’S P. O. V

“What the hell do you think of yourself? “

I realized it was Suni, oops sorry Khadija. I also realized my entire family were surrounding me including my parents who Rehana called home so we could all reconcile.

” I don’t know what you talking about… “ I reply haughtly

” What was his fault Munira? Was it his fault that he has cancer or was it his fault you were frustrated with life and your parents? Trust is everything in a relationship and when he came with the news to you. That trust he had in you is broken. His heart broken and lost right now and any minute he can die but did you ever care because I guess not. “

I laugh coldly as I say,” So he also lied to you about having leukemia. Wow his a good liar if you actually bought his story. “

She angrily shouted through the phone,” Are you delusional women? My brother is dying and here I’m listening to you spouting such nonsense. People aren’t dolls. You can’t just play with them and put them back in the box when you done. Remember I will never forgive you for this. ”

I reply,” Oh don’t forget to tell Nazir I’m getting married too. Tell him to wish me luck. “

Before she could continue I cut the call but I realized then that everyone has been staring at me.

” What?, “ I ask

Rehana looks at me and says,” What have you done Munira? “

I shrug and say,” What I should have done to the idiot long time ago. “

Mum waves a paper in front of my face and says,” He has leukemia Munira and here you being so heartless. Did I raise you like this.?”

“Oh cut it out mum, We all know he faked it all. “ I say coldly.

Rehana picks the paper up and says,” How do you wake up in the morning? Knowing that you have hurt someone with your words. Anger doesn’t solve anything Munira but it can destroy everything you worked for. Being Angry Munira is like holding a piece of coal in your hand and hoping the other person feels pain. “

” Oh please Rehana are you my sister or his? After everything you went through I can’t believe that you here lecturing me so when you cheated on your husband with his brother. How disgusting. “

Mum gets up and comes towards me and slaps me making my face turn to my side,” Just because you angry doesn’t mean you have the right to be cruel. “

Taahir cautiously says,” Don’t let yourself get so angry that you stop loving, because one day you will wake up from that anger and the people you love won’t be around anymore. Remember speak when you angry and that will be the best speech you will regret. “

Dad cuts in and says,” Don’t do something permanently stupid just because you temporarily stupid. Choices made in anger cannot be undone. I know because I believe it is my fault you are this way because if I gave it, maybe the outcome would have been different. My ego and stubbornness was stopping me which is why I’m saying don’t let your ego and stubbornness control you. Whatever begins in anger only ends in shame. “

Rehana says,” Please just call and ask for forgiveness then you don’t even have to see him. “

” Why don’t you call your brother in law and ask for forgiveness I say? “

Rehana gasps and says,” Just because you angry doesn’t give you a right to hurt me. I always use to think of you as somebody that would never hurt me but I guess I was wrong. It’s so sad how we were best friends for years but everything can change in just a couple of seconds. You have no idea how worthless you made me feel.

I watch on coldly as I turn on my feet and leave not bothering informing anyone where I’m going.

NAZIR’S P. O. V

I Heard every single thing between the conversation and I felt my heart break in pieces as I looked at my sister and said, “ The worst day of loving some one is the day that you lose them. The hardest thing I have to do now is watching someone I love, love someone else. That’s like breaking my heart In a million pieces.”

UWAIS’S P. O. V

Time flies. Time waits for no man. Time heals all wounds. All any of us wants is more time. Time to stand up. Time to grow up. Time to let go. All we need is more time but that’s the one thing we can’t afford.

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السلام علیکم و رحمة الله و بركاته 🌷

Hows everyone during this lockdown? 🌷So any ways with this lockdown I had a lot of writers block and no inspiration but alhamdulillah I managed to pen down this post (lol). So please let me know what everyone that’s reading this thinks of this post🌸It’s really long too🌷

May Allah keep us safe from this pandemic and cure it as soon as possible Insha’Allah Aameen🌸

Take care

Episode 104

Health And Sickness From Allah.

NAZIR’S P. O. V

Sometimes we wonder Why me??Why did this have to befall me?? And why could it not be someone else? I tried so much to push away the people who I knew loved me but I think the one that hurt me the most was Munira’s. I mean I loved her and the day I actually was gonna tell her that, a big bomb drops on me not only making me question my lifestyle but my relationship with Allah too.

Well my relationship with Allah was my weakest relationship in this life and now when my time is limited, I’m rushing to gain a closeness to my creator. I remember when Ali Banaat said, ” My biggest regret is that it took a man in suit and tie to tell me that I am going to die, but Allah (S. W. T) told me all my life and I did not believe him.”

I realized that even though I knew I had less than 3 months to live, I was going to try to be a better person and gain closeness to Allah.

Which is why when Munira messages me and says, ” I wish I didn’t meet you because then there wouldn’t be a need for my heart to break😭💔.”

I knew right than that I had to meet her and be the one to tell her so I replied, “ Can we meet? It’s urgent.”

As I waited for a minute and my phone pinged with a reply. As I rushed out of my house to go to the park where we used to meet, I see her sitting on a bench with her shoulders drooping and a depressing aura surrounding her. As I sat next to her, she didn’t even move or act like I was there but then

“Why did you call me here to meet? ” She asked

I sighed and said,” Because this is the most comfortable place to be because what I’m going to tell you isn’t easy. Not even my family know. “

She huffs and says,” I’m not your human diary. You just like all the other guys……….

I cut her of as I say, ” I have Leukemia Munira.”

She stops and says, ” What did you say Nazir? Did you just say that you have Leukemia?”

I sigh and nod my head saying, “That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

What happened next shocked me to the core.

Munira jumps up from the place next to me angrily and stomps her feet saying, ” Don’t you dare pull that trick with me. I’m not some girl you can play with OK. Do you even know what leukemia is Nazir? How can you even take something like this as a joke. Get your facts straight. You just a playboy Nazir. You like a rock and have no real feelings… Maybe one day when you lose the person you love the most breaks your heart then you will know what a heart that breaks feels like. “

” Just keep quiet Munira, “ I shout,” You don’t even know what you speaking about. I don’t even know why I decided to meet you and actually give you a reason about why we will never be together. But you know what you right, I’m just a playboy who has no emotions. I’m just like other guys and my heart is unbreakable. But guess what? My heart just broke and guess what I’m more hurt than you can imagine but I’m glad I get to see the person that you really are. Thanks for showing me that person. I don’t want you in my life. So this is it and here’s the proof. Assalamualaykum Wa’alaikum” I throw the results in to her face and turn around walking as fast as possible to my car as the tears freely flowed from my eyes.

Sometimes when the person you love the most, hurts you the most. It’s better to stay quiet, Because, If your love wasn’t enough…. Do You think your words will matter?

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السلام علیکم و رحمة الله و بركاته 🌷

How are you all? 🌸

Maaf for the Super delayed post.

In light of recent development around the world, please lets make lots of dua and istigfaar. 🌸

May Allah protect us from any of these illnesses. Aameen🌹

Episode 103

Name Change

UWAIS’S P. O. V

Living in Madina Munawarra was one of the most amazing and blessed things ever. Every morning waking up and knowing that you are in the Blessed land of our Nabi صلي الله عليه وسلم makes you feel content. Knowing that our Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم Has walked these very places and his scent would linger even after he passed those places. Just knowing that right at this moment that we are in the same place Nabi صلى الله عليه وسلم Is, makes one’s heart content and exceptionally happy.

Suni and I have a routine now, although Suni will be giving birth shortly I can say that she has been doing everything in her control to make the most of the situation especially cooking and cleaning. I’m proud that she is the women I married.

There has been something that has been troubling me for a while now.. Suni’s name that is.

Narrated in Abu Dawood that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم Has said, “ On the day of Qiyaamah you will be called by your names and the names of your fathers. Therefore keep good names.”

In Islam, calling a Muslim by his or her original name describes their identity. Sunaina’s name is not an Islamic name in any way. The name Sunaina is from the Hindu origin which means beautiful eyes. That is why I have decided to speak to Sunaina about a name change.

As I enter the kitchen where Sunaina is munching on some snacks.

“Baby, ” I speak aloud as I enter the kitchen.

Sunaina looks at me questioningly and says,” Jee, Is everything Ok babes? “

I sit down next to her and say seriously,” I was thinking about naming our baby and I decided to do a little bit of research regarding your name. I haven’t heard a name quite like it in Islam. “

” And, ” Sunaina says waiting for me to carry on.

I smile and say,” The name Sunaina is from Hindu origin which means beautiful eyes. I know that I’m asking a lot from you but do you think that we can change your name? “

Sunaina smiles and says,” Babes if my name is not Islamic in anyway then by all means I would change it but to what.” As she starts thinking.

“Well, ” I mutter happily,” I know the perfect name for you but it’s your decision after all. “

Sunaina jumps up and wraps her arms around my neck and asks happily,” Well are you going to tell me. “

I smile as I wrap my arms around her and say,” Well the name I like is Khadija after the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم ‘s wife Khadija رضي الله عنها “

Sunaina hugged me and said,” I don’t think any name can be better than that, Alhamdulillah. “

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Assalamualaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu♥️

Hope everyone is well alhamdulillah.🌸 Hope you’ll enjoyed this episode and let us all try to remember Sunaina’s new name. 🌷

Episode 102

Hope And Redemption

MUNIRA’S P. O. V

Have you ever wondered why there is so much heartaches in this world? Why do people always intend to commit suicide? I tried so hard to understand these people, I tried so hard to make sense of it. In the end tho I couldn’t get the exact answer I was looking for.

I’m sure if anyone heard my thoughts right at this moment they would be utterly confused. So let me go back to the very beginning.

*Flashback*

I sat in Ray’s Garden as the sun shined directly on my face as I was lost in thought after thought when my phone rang, so I picked up and guess who it was.?

Sunaina who is by the way Nazirs sister. I’m actually really lucky to get a call even tho she’s on the other side of the world.

“Assalamualaykum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu, “Sunaina greeted in a sweet and soft voice.

I replied in a dull voice,” Wa’alaikum Us Salaam WA Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu. “

Sunaina let out a gentle sigh as she said,” How are you Munira? ” I replied by saying,” I’m OK as usual and you? “

” I’m good Alhamdulillah Shukr, “Sunaina gentle voice comes through the phone.

I get impatient as I say,” What do you want Sunaina? “ I hear Sunaina’s breath hitch before she continues to say,” Please just call me Suni. I think you know why I called? “

I get angry as I rudely tell her,” Please just mind your own business.. “

Sunaina is quiet for a few seconds before she speaks,” Do you know what’s it like to feel these little flutters in your tummy at different times of the day? Let me tell you, it’s amazing actually. Do you know the pain that you also go through because of the very being in your tummy? Well it’s uncomfortableness and sleepless nights all wrapped in one. Women suffer from backaches, stomach aches, morning sickness, swelling, mood swings, cravings etc. These are all what women have to go through for this beautiful being that Allah has created. Then why do some mothers and father never want these beautiful beings that Allah has created. I don’t know about the giving birth part as yet but I heard it pains as hell, but just as Allah is taking me through this then so will my Allah take me through that”Suni pauses before she continues, “ I know that feeling of feeling abandoned Munira, because i was a baby whose mother didn’t want me. She felt no bond with me even after 9 months. I never felt a mother’s love, her comfort, her hugs and much more. I wondered so often if maybe I had some defect when I was born for her to even give me away like I’m some trash. On the other hand Munira, my brother Nazir grew up with 2 loving parents. Let’s say he was blessed with 2 mothers and a father who loved him. My brother grew up in a different environment Munira, I don’t know how to say this without you thinking I’m the enemy but have you ever seen him read a Quran, or read a salaah or even make a few dhikrs? No I’m sure of that, but I’m sure you must have seen him drink alcohol, go to clubs, smoke weed and the list goes on and on. That’s the life he grew up with. I might have grew up that way but I make a lot of shukr that Allah guided me to the right path even if Mika’eel had to pass away because that was exactly Allah’s plan. If Mika’eel didn’t pass away in that car accident, where would our lives be now? In the same place it was that time, in ignorance. Which is why I am so thankful for my husband, I became a better Muslim before him and alhamdulillah now that I’m married to him, he always encourages me to do the best because there is always room for improvement.”Suni stops as he takes a sip of water and continues, “ Munira why boycott your parents? For what? A guy whose not even worthy of that sacrifice. Our parents can sacrifice a thousand things for us but not once can we sacrifice anything for them. If you decide to go ahead with it, this will break up your entire family who stood with you but Munira remember Ray went through something Insha’Allah none of us have to go through. Which is why she is worried that you might do something drastic. Always remember that your parents are your means to jannah. “

I was in tears as I sob out,” I’m overpowered by guilt Suni. What do I do? “

” Apologize to them, “Was the reply.

I asked,” Will they forgive me? “

“ They are your parents and they love you so they would forgive you in a heart beat, “Suni reply,” Before I forget Ray told me about the people your dad told you they are from Durban, well my husband did some homework and alhamdulillah they a good family, so think of that before you decide anything. “

I sobbed harder than ever as I realized that I defied my parents but this was the will of Allah. My parents were not controlling me because they were protecting me from any harm. They couldn’t do it Ray’s time but they did it with me.

All I could say as I sobbed, ” Jazakallahu Khayr Suni. I really appreciate it even though Nazirs your brother.” All I could hear was, ” I dont want a girl to go through a tough time Munira.”

After we greeted each other and cut the call. I burst out inconsolably as thought of what I did, how I was so close to breaking a family. My family!!

A guilt started in the pits of my tummy as I realized that I kept blaming my parents for things going wrong in my life when in fact my connection with Allah was really weak. I blamed them even when all they tried to do was bring me back, back home.

Whoever tasted the sweetness of Imaan, will always recognize the bitterness of sins. Just for one moment I experienced the sweetness of Imaan and the regret and guilt of my sins flooded my system.

I read some where that, “ They look for the likes of Romeo and Juliet leaving the purest love story of the Prophet Muhammed صلى الله عليه وسلم And Ayesha رضي الله عنها, Where he died with his head resting on her chest.”

I know what my mother has tried to explain to me many a times but I turned a deaf ear to her. She always said that a female doesn’t want a rich man, a handsome man, or even a poet. She wants a man who understands her eyes if she gets sad and points to his chest and says,” here is your home. “ This is the kind of thing I want to be blessed with. I didn’t understand my mother then and I guess I didn’t understand her now.

Ali Ibne Abi Talib رضي الله عنه has said,” Fear the sins that you commit in secret, because the witness of those sins is the judge himself. “

I then remembered what my Ml in Madressa had told us that when you feel heartbroken and disappointed because things don’t seem to make sense put your hands up and talk to the almighty. You don’t need words if the hurt is to much. Speak silently from your heart. He made it. He will surely mend it.

I laugh because how easily I fell into societies trap. You buy your own car and people laugh because it’s second hand or not a Mercedes, BMW or an Audi. You get a job and people laugh saying it’s a crap place to work. You get your own place to live, it’s not a nice area to live in. You get married and people say their personality isn’t good or they don’t suit each other because his fair and she isn’t. It’s weird that even when a person is making positive movements, people still have something to say. I think as you happy and proud of yourself then you should forget what everyone says. I guess this has been my downfall to, I kept trying to please society. How would I be content if I was pleasing My Allah’s creation and displeasing the creator himself?

I think that whether you drive a BMW or a Maruti, the road remains the same. Whether you fly business or economy, your destination doesn’t change. Whether you wear Titan or Rolex, time remains the same. Whether you use a Samsung or Apple, the people who call you are the same. There is nothing wrong with dreaming about a luxurious life. What needs to be seen is that need doesn’t become greed because needs can always be met. But greed can never be fulfilled.

At the end as I felt arms wrap around me all I could utter was, “Those who leave everything in Allah’s hands will eventually see Allah’s hands in everything.”

Episode 101

Who Is Family?

MUNIRA’S P. O. V

Have you ever felt like you don’t know what’s going on anymore? Like you don’t care about anything anymore. You’ve lost your motivations to do anything. You are confused about your feelings, and you can’t explain how you feel. You have that feeling of emptiness, and the feeling that no one is there for you. That feeling that no one understands you anymore. And it seems like there’s nothing to look forward to anymore. Yeah, I get these feelings too.

People think depression is sadness. People think depression is crying. People think depression is dressing in black. But people are wrong. Depression is the constant feeling of being numb. Being numb to emotions, being numb to lie. You wake up in the morning just to go back to bed again. Days aren’t really days, they are just annoying obstacles that need to be faced. And how do you face them? Through medication, through drinking, through smoking, through drugs, through cutting. When you depressed, you grasp on to anything that can get you through the day. That’s what depression is, not sadness or tears, it’s the overwhelming sense of numbness and the desire for anything that can help you make it from one day to the next.

As I stare blankly at the wall in the guestroom of Ray’s house, I wondered where it all went wrong. Ray knocks lightly on the door and walks in lying next to me on the bed.

“Hey Munz,”Ray says quietly

I remain silent as I continue looking at the blank walls.

Ray sighs loudly and says, “Munz don’t worry about them, they will come around soon,”

“They haven’t called as yet Ray, “I say,” They my parents and they just forgot that I actually exist. “

Ray comfortingly says,” Munz give them time, they both will come around. “

” No, ” I shout,” You don’t get it do you Ray, the only worst thing than being hated is being ignored. At least when they hate you they treat you like you exist.” I pause and continue, ” That’s the problem Ray with getting attached to someone. WHEN they leave you, you just feel lost even if it’s your own family.”

Ray says, “ Sometimes Munz in life, you learn lessons. And sometimes you learn them the hard way. Sometimes you learn them too late.”

I say and say, ” There has never been a time in my life where I ever felt good enough or worthy enough Ray. All I ever heard were ‘Munira are you stupid to have done this’ and ‘ Do you even have a brain?. There were many more and I guess this just tops the cake Ray, this just tops the cake Ray,” I whisper as I end.

I’m so tired. Tired of all the pain, tired of all the sadness, but most of all I’m tired of being me.

.

Episode 100

Asalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatu🌼

I cannot believe that we have reached the 100th episode. Yay, this is an achievement.❤️ I remember the day I started this blog and I typed out the first episode,my entire plot was much more different than it is now. I know it seemed that yes these characters were all happy so where did the sudden twist come buttttt that’s life I guess. Everyone shows a happy side even tho they have alot more problems in life. Any ways I’m really happy that it reached the 100th episode. So please do comment and chare your thoughts even the silent readers🌼💖

My Home, My Prison.

MUNIRA’S P.O.V

What exactly is pain? I wondered. How did one know which pain they experiancing? I guess when you break it down then I would say their are two types of pain, One that hurts you and the other that changes you. I guess when my family didn’t really accept Nazir and forbid me to ever see him, I was hurt because they should have trusted me but now when my father is practically forcing me to get married that is the other pain I’m talking about. I’m not numb,i don’t even know what I’m feeling. I feel like a stranger is living in my body,my thoughts,my expressions.

I learned once that relationships are like glass. Sometimes it is better to leave them broken than to try and hurt yourself by putting it back together. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m tired of everything and I’m tired of this family, if they really cared for my happiness then this wouldn’t be happening. There is a difference between giving up and knowing when you have had enough. I literally have no motivation to save myself anymore. Let what happens,happen because I don’t really care.

Sometimes I still have to take a deep breath and remind myself that not everybody will break me like my family did. What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it’s supposed to be. I keep alot to myself because it’s difficult to find people who will understand.

Just then I hear Ray from downstairs and I wondered what the commotion is. So I decided to go check it out but when I entered the lounge everyone went silent. Ray stands up and comes over to hug me.

With tears in her eyes she said,” Dad just look at Munira,she looks like a shell of herself. It’s like whatever you do now will not matter now. If you go through with this dad niether of the two will be happy. This is just going to be a destruction.”

“Rehana,” Dad Says angrily,” This is my house and my rules. I don’t want her to even associate herself with those Patel’s . Did you hear me Rehana?,”

Taahir speaks up quietly,” Dad this is wrong. You can’t force her to get married. Islamically it’s a sin.”

Dad laughs sarcastically and says,” Now you talking of sin but it didnt occur to you while both of you had an affair under Aziz’s roof”

Everyone is stunned in to silence and we cannot believe for a second that the person in from of us is actually our father.

“Waseem,” Mum says in shock,” What is wrong with you? How could you even say that?!”

Dad looks upset that mum questioned him and I see him debating his next words.

“Listen here,” Dad Says,” I’m the men in this house and I decide what goes on.”

Ray sighs in frustration as she says,” Dad don’t destroy other people’s life because of your own ego and judgy attitude.,”She pauses,” I’m So glad Dad that now I know what you actually think of us. Congratulations Dad,”Ray says sarcastically,” You have just lost yourself a daughter.”

Mum quickly speaks up,” Ray don’t take this drastic decision right now. Every one is just fuelled by anger . Let’s cool down and speak rationally.”

“Oh yes MOM,” Ray sarcastically says,” That is always what you do. You never care about us. Was Dad right in judging me or judging Munira?”

After a moment of Silence for the first time Sahal speaks up,” Rays right Mum and Dad. We not perfect and we have no right to judge them.”

Dad stands up in anger and walks out of the lounge as Mariam enters the lounge in confusion.

Just as Dad takes a step out he turns towards us and says,” Everyone one of you’ll get out of my house. This is not your house anymore. You are all dead to me. I regret ever having children.”

With that we looked shocked as Mum starts crying in the background as our lives shatter.

Episode 99

Are My Family My Enemy???

MUNIRA’S P.O.V

“Family is what can sometimes hurt you the most.” I don’t think many will believe this is true but yes it’s the most sad reality of life. I know every family has problems but I really admire those that stay togather despite it. I just don’t know what to do, I don’t get it, why are my parents that upset about this? I love him and I know I’ll be happy with him. Sometimes I feel that I should just elope because my family will never give in

The worst feeling in the world is knowing that you both love each other but still you just can’t be together. Sometimes I think this I’m Juliet to my Romeo, with all this forbidden love. One day Whether you are 14,25 or 65, you will stumble upon someone who will start a fire in you that will not die. However the saddest,m post awful truth you will ever come to find, is that they are not always with whom we spend our lives. I’m not even angry anymore because I just feel numb now, like nothing in this world matters.

Just then Sahal walks in to the room, closing the door behind him and settles on the bed.

“I’m really sorry Munira,” He says regretfully with eyes cast downwards.

I reply,” What’s the use now Sahal, The damage has already been done.”

“I know,” He says,” And maybe it’s not too late to fix it.”

I mutter depressingly,” I wish there was a way Sahal because as I see it my own family are like my enemies right now. I know I can make this decision in my life but why should it be compared to Rays?

Sahal sighs,” I don’t think mum and dad want another story as Rays. They scared,” He pauses,” I gotta agree tho this guy’s family is sketchy.”

My eyes burn with anger,” What is so sketchy about his family Sahal? Because his father divorced twice or because his sister committed suicide or because his brother married few weeks after his wife passed away. This could happen to anyone but the only reason we know so much of their lives Is because they are rich and that’s how society is. Look at the middle class, do we even hear stories from any of them? No, but yes they also have problems. Which century are you living in. No family is perfect,every family has problems but not everyone’s dirty laundry is advertised.” I yell.

Sahal looks shocked for a moment and says,” I didn’t mean it like that but I think this is best for you so just forget him.”

I look tired as I tell him,” Just get out of my room this minute, I can’t even bear to look at you,” as I turn away.

He stands up from the bed and he takes about a step or two when the door opens and Dad stands their with a cold look in his eyes.

He looks between us and says,” Munira someone proposed for you. They from Durban but has been in Johannesburg till the week end so they coming to see you tomorrow. You should forget that boy because I want you to say yes to this proposal.”With that he turns and leaves.

I sat on my bed stunned and shocked and then I realized that the people that hurt you the most are your very own family.

Asalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatu🌼 Hope everyone is well alhamdulillah shukr. This post took alot of thought put in to it and hopefully it turned out better than I thought. Let me know what everyone thinks.

Episode 98

Drama Follows me

MUNIRA’S P.O.V

Do you know that moment when you have been caught doing something you not supposed to be doing? Exactly that is how I am feeling right at this moment as Sahal barges into my room and all I could do was sit there and look guilty. I couldn’t look Sahal in his face. My family warned me before about this family. They rich and outta our league and when Yumna passed away, they were relieved that my contact with Nazir has ended. They didn’t want another Suhail roaming aimlessly looking for a Patel. So as I sat there all I could say was,

“I can explain Sahal but please don’t tell anyone in our family.” I beg. NOT realizing that my mother has entered in that exact moment and then I knew that maybe just maybe this was the end for us.

“What’s happening?” Mum asked

Suhail and I looked at each but I think the phone he was holding was a big give away. Mum takes the phone from his hand and reads the exact same message that Sahal read. I see anger flush in her eyes as she glares at me.

She yells,” What the hell is this Munira?”

“Mum I can explain please don’t yell.” I say quietly

“What,”She says,” Don’t yell! You deliberately went against everything we told you Munira. This is a disappointment.”

I stand up stubbornly and say,” But mum his just my friend. I’m allowed to have him as a friend.”

Dad and Maryum walks into the room next and guessing by the anger on Dad’s face I’m guessing he heard our oh so lovely (note the sarcasm) conversation.

“Munira,”Dad Says,” I didn’t expect this from you.”

” I’m sorry Dad, I just couldn’t do what you asked me to. I tried truly I did, but it was the most difficult thing I have ever done. Dad please don’t do this to me. I can’t live with out him.” I cry as I beg my dad .

“No Munira,” Dad Yells,” I don’t want the same thing that happened to your sister to happen to you.”

I say calmly,” But it won’t dad. It worked out in the end for Ray tho Dad.”

“Right,” Dad Says sarcastically,” That boys family is dysfunctional. Come on His father married another women and divorced that women. The sister kills herself and the brother married another girl 3 weeks after his wife died. I mean come on Munira wake up and smell the coffee. This family is toxic. Whoever connects with this family, gets damaged in some way. Just look at your brother, he roams India like a Mad Majnun. This is my final decision.”

I cry and look at the man that was like my own personal teddy bear. I couldn’t even look at my family right now as they acted as an enemy to me. I looked at Sahal and for the first time I see no sympathy on his face, I turned to look at mum and all I see is anger, when I looked at Dad I saw ten times the anger on his face than mum’s and finally I looked at Maryum and I saw what I hoped was understanding. She knew it with out words, She knew I loved him and I just couldn’t live without him. Even if it’s all he could offer was friendship. I pleaded with her to please speak to them with my eyes.

Maryum begans,” Why don’t we call him home and he can clarify our doubts and give us some answers Dad.”

“No,” Dad says,” This is my final decision and whoever doesn’t want to accept that then there’s the door *points to the door* they can leave.” With that he turns and leaves the room.

The English saying Love is blind is so true. Our Nabi صلي الله عليه وسلم said something to this effect,” Love makes you blind, deaf and dumb.” While we fall in love, we become so blind,deaf and dumb that the people who care for us, who are our life support are the ones we consider as an enemy. I didn’t know how true that would be when it came to the future. If I knew I would have tried to I don’t know stop myself from falling in to this trap of Shaytaan.

Episode 97

Asalamu Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatu💖 I’m back after a long awaited holidays. Hopefully all of you that love to read my blog,enjoy this. Let me know what you think after you read it🌼

Twinsy

NAZIR’S P.O.V

What is meant when we speak about mental health and mental illness? I didn’t know what it meant to until my sister passed away because of it. I didn’t know my sister that well, by living in Hawaii for most of my life I was closer to Suni and Bilaal. Yunus and Yumna were breaking away from the family. We don’t even hear about Yunus after our family broke apart. I don’t even know how old my own niece is. Any ways sometimes I just wish that I could just leave my family and all the problems that come with it. I guess Yumna thought the same thing but the past will always catch up with you no matter how far you run.

Being in South Africa for about 2 months now and I spent most of my time with Azraa secretly Ofcourse since none of my family know that I’m still in South Africa.

TAAHIRS P.O.V

Waking up next to the love of your life is a feeling of phenomenal happiness. I can’t even explain it. After many years Ray and I could finally be together. I can just remember my nikaah like it was yesterday. Most memorable time of my life was meeting Ray after our Nikaah

*Flashback*

As I entered Rays house, there was alot of activity as I made my way to the room was in when suddenly Zaeem runs from the back and launches himself at my legs,catching hold of the right one.

” Daddy, you back. I missed you alot.” Zaeem says rather cutely

I pick Zaeem up as I peck his cheek rather happily,” Yes champ, I’m back. Are you excited that we all going to be living together?”

Zaeem smirks rather cheekily and says,” Yes Daddy, I can’t wait. Mummy says that I’ll have my own room and she’s going to make it really smart.”

“Yes Baby,” I say,” Anything for you, let me go see mummy now,” As I put him back on the floor, he runs away quickly to find one of his grandparents to share the news.

REHANA’S P.O.V

I wait patiently for Taahir, knowing now that it’s the real thing, it’s halaal now. When I hear the knock.

“Come in,” I say.

Taahir walks in as I admire how he looks and well you could say I checked him out and well he checked me out to.

Taahir walks in confidently as he closes the door and locks it as my heart beats like it is going out of control. He sits down next to me and takes my hand from my lap as he intertwines our fingers.

I blush and Taahir chuckles and says,” Well look whose blushing? I don’t think I would ever get tired of it* As he winks.

He takes out a ring from his pocket as he takes my finger and slides it on and kisses my hand after his done. I turn slightly as I take the ring from the night stand and I slide it on his finger.

He suddenly says,” Ray we finally togather. I can’t believe it, because it feels like a dream come true. We finally a family. No threats to our family anymore. I’ll protect you Ray with my life.” He pulls me towards him and hugs me tightly as tears seep out of our eyes in happiness.

Azraa’s P.O.V

This past few days have been the most busiest time of my life with my sister getting married and Suhails best friend commiting suicide. Actually it’s been busy with Nazir. I may have been lacking on stuff just to spend time with him as this weekend he might leave for Hawaii. I know that you might think why am I doing secretly? It’s because everyone I think might just have a problem with it especially Suhail. Nazir and I are friends since I met him in Hawaii but I didn’t think our friendship would continue after I left but imagine my surprise when I saw him at Rays friends brothers wedding. I then realized that in a way we all connected somehow. His family is a broken one right now. I think he feels alot of pressure because the people his most closest to are not here anymore. Suni is in Medina and Bilaal and Rubz are thinking of moving away to. I always told him that money doesn’t matter because it can never keep a family together. Another reason that I hide what I have with Nazir is because my family isn’t ‘holy’ but we not allowed to date,you get the idea. So yes I was afraid daily about getting caught.

Nazir and Nazira are completing their last year of Neurology this year and then both will be so busy with work and their lives which is why I’m happy to be getting this time with him.

As I sat in my room thinking of things, my brother Sahal barges into the room with anger written in his features as he shows me my phone with a message from Nazir.

“WHAT IS THIS MUNIRA?,” He says clenching his jaw in anger.

All I can think at this is oh my word!!! How am I going to get out of this mess?

Holiday Break!!!

السلام عليكم و رحمة الله وبركاته🌸

How is everyone doing?❤️Ok so I know everyone is awaiting the next episode butttttttt this holidays has been so busy so I’ll be back to posting when Schools start🌸 Hopefully I can give everyone a post a week or two times a week.❤️ Remember me in your duas💖 And keep Enjoying the holidays⛅️

Lots of Love

LOVE, BETRAYALS AND LIES.🌸

وعليكم السلام والرحمة الله وبركاته❤️